The Difficulties of Long Distance Relationships


After much hesitation and deliberation, I decided to explore the possibilites of a long distance relationship with a girl from Tampa Bay, Florida. I had heard the rumours, asked her if there was any truth in them which she denied. Giving her the benefit of doubt, I made arrangements to go see her. I wanted to believe that she was honest and genuine.

We had been talking for several months online. She does not work full time, so I either had to fly there or fly her to Canada. I thought it would make her more confortable staying at home, so I took time off work and booked a round trip flight from Toronto to Tampa.

Although we had talked alot over many months; as soon as I arrived at the airport, I knew things did not seem right. There were mental and physical health issues I was not aware of. There were financial issues she had that I was not aware of.

While leaving the airport I said I would cover the costs of the meals and even offered to stop and get some groceries. I knew within a couple of days that there were too many differences and things I did not find pleasing, but offered to stay and try to make the best of a bad situation. Through the entire week we were together, she only made supper once (store frozen pizza I bought) and we had two breakfasts of cereal I bought. Everyday I took her out for brunch and supper to a different restaurant because she did not like to cook.

We had planned on going to St Petes for the DNA Florida Contest Saturday night, but I thought it would be good to get her out of her tiny hotel size apartment; so I booked Friday and Saturday for two nights at St Petes so she could relax, go swimming in the pool, etc..

Unfortunately within a couple of hours of arriving at the hotel, I discovered she had a major drinking problem. She was plastered by supper time and things just got worse as the night wore on. She made an ass out of herself. That did not impress me and that set the tone for the rest of the weekend.

We returned to Tampa Sunday around noon, and had made plans to hold an Informal Gathering later that evening. She was still ‘under the weather’ and could not go. At that time I told her she needed to go to AA.

On Monday I said there were too many surprises, that she was not taking care of herself and I could not trust her with all of the deception and lies. I said I would go to a hotel and we could not continue.

She demanded I give her money since she only had 100 dollars until next week when her disability check came in. Another surprise since I thought she was working. I paid for some groceries when I arrived, I paid for all the meals as we daily ate out at restaurants. On top of that I bought her some clothes. (The next day, after I left,  she went out and bought a bird and cage).

She threatened that she would attack me in posts if I did not give her some money. Extortion and threats are something I will never bow to. I laughed at her, packed up my stuff and got the hell out of there. I have spent over $1700 on airfare, hotels, entertainment,  food and clothes in just under a week to see if this was a possibilty…. Lesson learned.

Well…. at least she kept her word – attacks already started within minutes after I left. I am sure she will continue over the next few months as she is hanging out with people I have no use for (Dragon and Prae).

The funny thing is that when I left I said I would still offer to help her out by sending $250 next paycheque from work. I guess she kissed that money good-bye. Expensive mistake on her part…..


In Leather



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