Leaving A Legacy Of Positive Results


I have been reflecting lately about how we touch people’s lives, and the importance of leaving a legacy of positive results. I have always tried to encourage others by words and action.

This has come in may forms; from helping a friend move, to visiting the sick in the hospital, to supporting through financial or other means of support.

Hospital Visitation
I remember many a time dee and I would travel to a hospital to visit someone who was ill. Oftentimes we were one of the few friends they had that would bother to take the time to do such a simple thing as visit.

Moving Others
I remember one particular summer a few years ago moving different people from the kink community almost every single weekend throughout the summer. Sometimes there was only a very small group of volunteers, and the move lasted until midnight. I always offered when others would not take the time.

Officiating Ceremonies
I have been honoured on several occasions to officiate a Collaring Ceremony, or stand as Best Man in a wedding. It brings me great joy to see many of those couples still in a loving relationship with each other. There is a sense of pride and purpose when I see several girls that were in my Collar be transferred to someone else and they are growing in a loving relationship.

I have been blessed to be asked to be a Godfather to several children whose parents are either in my Leather Family, or I was involved years ago leading groups they were a part. I have watched these children grow, and have been involved in many of their lives from attending sporting events, to school plays, to birthday celebrations. Just recently I was asked by one of my Godchildren to be the Godfather to their firstborn. I guess that makes me a Godgrandfather?

I have always been a strong supporter of gifting. It may be a book I enjoyed reading, or a piece of clothing or a picture. Oftentimes it is something that is important to me, that has special meaning and value, that I want to share it with others. It may seem like a small token, but to anyone I have gifted something, it is because I care about them and want to share with them what and why that particular item means so much to me.

Words of Praise and Encouragement
I have always tried to support and encourage others, It may be a private message, or over a beer. Compliments are something everyone needs, and it feels good to share with others and make them feel noticed and encouraged. Sadly in today’s busy society, that is becoming a lost art.

Knowledge and Personal Experience
One of the greatest joys I have is sharing with others about my journey. I love to share what I have learned; the triumphs, the humourous situations, and the failures. Hopefully through my sharing it has been a positive and entertaining experience.

Providing Positive Space Safe Venues
It has been a privilege throughout the years to have helped organised and led many different service and community. beginning when I was a teen starting up a local Leo Club, to leading several missions service teams overseas, to establishing the Group of Ten, to Chairing a local Neighbourhood Community Association, to serving on several Board of Directors from radio media, civic and political persuasion, and alternative groups, to organising the original Traditions parties, to organising the Cambridge Mingle and Mixer, to helping run the Leather Traditions parties, to organising and speaking at different workshops and seminars, to whatever the Future holds.

I am blessed that I have had a positive impact on many lives. I am honoured that many have asked me to be an important continual part of their lives. i am especially honoured when people attend and appreciate the efforts of others to make their evening a safe positive experience.

Many I call friends. Some I call Godchildren. Some I call Family. Others I still call my girls. Some I call Brother or Sister. All I call important.

No Regrets
Although I am involved in many lives on different levels of commitment and relationships, it saddens me that some who at one time I call a friend, are now doing the opposite, There has been many a rumour, many an urban legend, and continuing gossip and disdain for myself and those close to me. I am disappointed at a couple I officiated their very special Collaring Ceremony. I broke bread with them. Welcomed them into my home. I am disheartened at others I helped become rude and pompous. i have witnessed some cave to peer pressure and turn on a dime. People are human. We all move in different directions and paths in our journeys. Some are for a season. Others for a generation. A very special few for a lifetime. I have no regrets for helping others. No regrets for offering to support and encourage others. No regrets for being me.

Those that are actual friends remain friends. Through the highs and lows, Through tribulations and victories. Those that are not, were only for a short distance in the journey. They can and are swayed by others. Friendship is fleeting to them.

No matter what or how long any were or continue to be a part of my life, I say “Thank you” and I appreciate the time we spend or have spent together. My desire is to leave a legacy of positive results. The journey continues…. and I look forward to where it leads….


(Wrote this post over a year ago on Fetlife)

In Leather

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